Legendary Queef - Episode 5

Say it with me: Studs can be feminine too! The depths of Janelle Monáe's Instagram Live videos, the trailer for Legendary has dropped and our first Bad Queer has arrived during our Am I a Bad Queer? Advice segment.
Also, queer is no longer a slur :)

Bad Queers is co-hosted by:
Shana Sumers: @shanahasagram
Kris Chesson: @kris.chess

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The opinions expressed during this podcast are conversational in nature and expressed only for comedic purposes. Not all of the facts will be correct but we attempt to be as accurate as possible. BQ Media LLC, the hosts, nor any guest host(s) hold no liability over the conversations on this podcast and by using this podcast you understand that it is solely for entertainment purposes.

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Transcript

spk_1:   0:06
This is Shanna and

spk_0:   0:08
Chris, and we are bad queers. If you came out of the closet and got put in a box stereotypes you don't belong to once again welcome to the bad Queers Club. All right, so this week and queer Urban Dictionary my term is queef sound. There s, um are there queef is defined as an audible release of air from the vagina. Typically during or after sexual intercourse. My sentence of the week is Hey, baby, don't worry about that, queef. That's my, uh, clear urban dictionary. Did you know that term? Shane, I teach you anything new with Queef. Look, I knew it, but I wasn't expecting you to say it, so here we are. I'm done. I I should have gone first this week. All right? My core urban dictionary. Term of the week, Is it oldie but goodie. It's you. All the definition is what a lesbian brings on. A second date is a well known joke that states that lesbians tend to fall in love on the first date and try to move in on the second used in a sentence. What do lesbians bring on a second date? Ah, you haul em So still raining true, you know. So I just I want to know the number of people that have had to u haul during this quarantine. Oh, God. And like, unexpectedly u haul as well, like some news. Just like, Oh, hey, like each probably didn't stay here are like a force you all like, like they have to you hold or you have been a forest. Or it could have been a like, Hey, we thought that this was a good idea. Yeah, and a few weeks in Do you regret it? Ah, and having to back out, but not being able. Teoh, I need to know. I feel like this has happened. Yeah, it's happened. Contact. This is this is the worst time to U Haul Folks like honestly, like I feel like it could really go either way. Like, could really be building some real relationships right now because you're you hauled and is just I mean, you're it is just strengthening through the square and team. Yep. Or you were trying to look into ways that you can make money to save up enough money to break a lease that you just signed. So things are happening. Either war either or on that one either or All right. Oh, man, that was That was a great start. Great start today. All right. You know what it is? It's time to hear about the stories we don't get to hear. It's clear news time. First on the track, the trailer has dropped for the nouveau competition. Legendary. And if you're wondering why that sounds familiar, Yes. This is the one that a while ago we had the issue with Djamila Jamil on it, and that was the whole thing. So you remember. You remember when Djamila Jameel came out? Do you remember a little bit like you? You did. I did not hear you put a little pause there. Okay, well, that pause should I wanted engagement from you. That's what I wanted. Like your audio and drop out. There s i e I'm not disrespecting humility meal like this in any way, but she felt like she had to come out because people called her out on about the show about this show. So I'll give you the background of the show first, and then we'll revisit to what happened in that area. So This is like the, you know the prequel to it. So thankfully, people have moved on from that, and we have a trailer. A wonderful, glorious, fierce, beautiful trailer for legendary. It's coming out on HBO Max on May 27th and I swear this is the fiercest fucking thing that's about to hit TV since Post. That's where, Matt. That's where I'm feeling. It's gonna be so great. So the premise of the show will be that voters are grouped into eight different houses and compete and balls. Uh, and they're gonna be a Fillon voguing. They're gonna be in, like, America's next top model level of fashion, and their goal is to achieve legendary status. So that is the whole goal of the show. It's totally looks like it looks like I say totally, but I'm hoping it looks like a zona represent the classic feel and vibe and everything of old school ball rooms and what used to happen with voguing and the history of it and so, so rewind. The whole reason why Djamila Djamila got all of this backlash was because there was a bunch of issues with people stating that she didn't represent the black LGBTQ plus community and therefore she should not be hosting. We went back and did some research she's not hosting. She's judging. She's one of the judges. Also, they were like, You're not queer, So why the fuck are you on this show? But then you have, like, making stallion and all these other people you just like, Okay, Like people come on his judges, for all sorts of things we have questions about, like American Idol judges at all these other things. So right, not coming on as an emcee. She is a judge to calm your tits. But also because of that, she felt like she was forced to come out and shoot like she did the whole admit things like twitters and nasty place. I didn't want to come out to all of this data. Thankfully, we are past it. But girl, at least the first couple episodes it's gonna be talked about. And I hope you're ready like I support you. And I'm here for you and all of the things. And I know that some of the ways that you engage with people was out of anxiety and stress, but also it is okay you're with family. All of these things We have the research people answer the questions. They didn't do a great job of releasing that initially. So I would blame HBO. But here we are. Yeah, but made 27. I'm excited. It's launching. I'm ready. Toe. Watch it. This and pose Life is going to be live Africa and pose. Oh, my God. Wow. Things that look forward to so many things. Yeah, I'm very excited for this show. I'm glad that you know they're doing it. So you know, Djamila Jimmy alone, You know, she caught some caught some flak. A lot of planning How a lot of flag. There's a lot. Maybe some of it warranted. Maybe something that unwarranted. But you know what? The show is coming. Yeah, and that's all that matters. And actually, it's good. Hopefully it will, uh, elevate some POC folks platforms as well as other performer non poc folks platform. And hopefully it's just a good ass show, maybe. No, I know they stumbled out with, like, just mentioning every who's gonna judge or m c. But I have a lot of hopes of the show, and I'm very excited for it. so we'll see what happens. Yep. Okay. And it's HBO. So it's gonna It's called legendary. This shit better be legendary. Yeah, Yeah. Making the stallion is a judge, right? Yo? Yes, Just just they they show a little facial snip snip of her. And could be I'm just like her commentary is already gold. I'm ready for it to be on that platform where she can kind of just say whatever she wants. Yeah, man, the quotes, the quotes and the gifts while excited. It's on HBO. No, like it's gonna be raws as I don't know what, but, um yeah, so we who he has something to mark down on our calendar and not as fun news. Oh, God. Pat Robinson. So if you don't know, uh, 90 year old is he is still living 90 year old televangelists Pat Robertson. He may or may not have heard of him or seen him before. Leads the 700 club, which is a Christian, um, TV show. Um, frequently, frequently rants against the queer community. Ah constantly spews anti gay propaganda. Um, and Monday was no different as he was responding to a viewer who asked if marriage equality an abortion were to blame for Kobe. 19. Uh, Robertson obviously said that John the viewer was right. I kind of believe he just made that up. That your question up, like he's like, Oh, just like, could he not come up with a better name if he was gonna make it up? I best lie. But I was like, Hey, he told you made this up. He was John Rhodin. Um and I think he just wanted to ran. But, um, Robertson said, and you know, the this is as an adult. Now, this is, like, kind of comical, more comical to me. And I know this isn't always good, but gonna read through it anyway, uh, the Bible says turn from their wicked ways. Ah, and Robertson said, We're not turning when we have done terrible things. We have broken the covenant that God made with mankind. We have violated his covenant. Wow, well held. We've allowed this terrible plague to spread throughout our society, and it's a small wonder God would hold us guilty, he said. The answer is, you confessed your sins and forsake them. Then he heals the land. It's not before Pat Rob has been speaking for Jesus and God, speaking out of term for Jesus and God, Probably all at least 89 of his 90 years. I picked this out because I just wanted I know we will have, like, you know, topics on Republicans and right wingers and and, um, you know, fake Christians like, Ah, um, Pat Robertson. He'll stop speaking for God like the Bible, literally. Since Steny of this, I still maintain that Sodom and Gomorrah was a story about a straight man that saw walks into a gay party and just wrote down what he saw happening. I would just like for us to leave God's work words alone. I just think at this point, if nothing else, he's probably telling us that Hey,

spk_1:   9:43
please stop

spk_0:   9:44
representing me. Please stop misrepresenting. And like Pat, Rob is like the oldest one. I don't know how he has not been slided from something before. Well, that's gotta Rio or Kobe 19. God only knows. But if we could all just like, I want us to find humor in in these still just these old relics because I don't think that these people are gonna kind of continue toe hold a place in society. What

spk_1:   10:07
thing I

spk_0:   10:08
found out about this Sorry interesting note about this is that the 700 club airs on CBM, which is the Christian Broadcasting Network. But it also Ares twice daily on freeform is these youth oriented network. Yes, it does that Queer inclusive entertainment An arm free form, The show proceeding. It always has disclaimers that says the people have free form. Would like you to know that we did not make this next program. We haven't seen it. Let's find a way to get it off. Freeform there, over here. Like not we didn't sign this contract. We didn't do it. If you know that once because I remember seeing Pat come on like right. That's when I knew to go to bed like i o I watched whatever was on at freeform now ABC family then, But I knew that like as soon as he came on, I was like, What? Nothing else is coming on tonight. It's just gonna be the nightly news. And it's time for me to go to bed like that was my clue. And I never sat listening like there's one time that I watched you for like, two seconds was, like, do not where I want to be. And I feel like the like platform or CBN or whatever. Signed a contract for, like, an infinity amount of years. Yeah, because they got, like, that Christian donation money they were able to foot whatever check it is. And so it's almost like that's, like, their dirty money. Yeah, equivalent of like, Hey, we are gonna were gonna hold on to that. But in return, we're gonna make a bunch of queer shit during the day and then just apologize. But just think all of these straight question people are actually paying for the quick content. So it's like, joke's on you. That's what I feel like has happened. And I that stays on that channel, and I

spk_1:   11:52
don't they just

spk_0:   11:52
come up with the like. There should be like a queer variety show that, like Proceeds 700 club, where it's probably like the Gaius show on Earth. And then you switch Teoh this silly man, SNL hasn't picked him up either. Yeah, I guess, more. They probably have because, I mean, he has been our childhood for yeah, for forever. We're gonna obviously but Jesus like. And speaking of Jesus, literally speaking for him in this way did not cause this. Abortions did not causes. And if anybody ah, anybody younger, especially or just anybody that's on freeform or just picks up any of these words and all these crazy pastors that are actually getting exposed right now because there's a lot of weird requests going one in the stand. Emmick. But anyways, just remember that there's a lot of fake Christians I hear misrepresenting God that it's the beginning of time. Pat Rob is no different. You'll probably never stopped happening, but Yep, yeah, she know. What's your next story? Howman. We all knew it was coming. We didn't want to admit it, but now it's officially been announced. It was only a matter of time. NYC New York City Pride has officially canceled all of its in person events, and it will go virtual for 2020. Now again, I will repeat. We all knew this was coming. We know we're not happy about it. We didn't want to talk about it. But when San Francisco Pride announced that it was no longer happening, you knew that New York City pride was going to announce it at the same time because they're usually held the same weekend. Yeah, I feel for New York because this was the year that our queen and treasure Jenna Monet was supposed to headline New York pride, and I was there, attempted to get tickets for that time to fly back over to New York to go and see Geno Monet in all the Queer Glory perform at Pride. And now we can't. But I'm hoping that she does a virtual version that we can at least hold on to for the moment. And then next year, when we get back to whatever we do for pride that it happens, I'm sad. I'm sad for all of the prize that are not going anywhere. But the positive is there will be a virtual pride event that's happening on June 27 but they haven't listed anything that have a listen to schedule or what's going on or anything like that. So we'll have to keep an eye out for what's going on. But, uh, you have seen Jenelle Monet at New York Pride and just let her like she comes out and you know that one year that I saw her, like four times. No, I did. You saw her four times when you're four times in a year and I got a front row every single time. All right? Wow. Oh, yes. I didn't let it go. Look on my instagram. I have me freaking out when she grows down on the floor in front Me? It's a beautiful thing, huh? Yeah. Did it check me out? And, um and then just like and her shows had, like, they were always unapologetic, but I know that she will up the ante of queerness four pride. And that's what I needed. That's what my heart needed. And that's what my soul needed. And so I'm hoping that there is some way, shape or form that she can have that explosive expression. We'll get it. We will get it. You know what? It's gonna be very interesting for pride virtual pride this year because it's just I think you could have a lot of different artists, obviously, to with virtual pride that you can tap into and just even see. Listen, if I could just see generals home, um I mean, I'm fine. I mean, I

spk_1:   15:31
don't know does she go alive? A lot.

spk_0:   15:32
I've never seen around like instrument does go on live, but it is almost like it's like an experience will because she's kiss. And the one time the last one I remember was when shoes down at the beach. I believe it was her birthday weekend. Yes, I do. Watch your life like that. Don't come. I was gonna say in her story, and she was in, like, that Rainbow Top or whatever. And she went on Instagram live. And I caught her pretty sure it was at work. And she was She was talking, but like she was just saying things. And, like her angelic voice way, just made everything sound like she was solving, like world peace and hunger and poverty and everything just in those sentences. And then she was like, OK, she got to a point where she provided the option for us to ask questions. But then she almost gave it like, a challenge. Like I'm only gonna ask answer good questions who are? But she had a better descriptive word, I say Good, but that's like beneath me. Funny you said that and I wasn't there, but I felt like through you telling me that like she was flirting with me right there A little bit off a little bit. Okay? I picked up on it from her and I wrote probably eight questions. And every time I wrote the miles like this isn't good enough. And then somebody would be like, you know, what does it mean to just be And she was starting to, like, you know, to be It's just the essence of what she would go off. And I'm like,

spk_1:   16:53
I don't even know what I ask that question. How do I go through and have

spk_0:   16:55
a conversation with you? I feel like if I had the opportunity to win a conversation with a normal day and sit down a doctor, I wouldn't know how to talk to her because she would just such another level of just even the English language, right? To put words together. And I just don't really I just like to sit in your presence. If we ever get her on the show, I and just gonna be like, Yep, and that's it. That's gonna be my only contribution. Well, I'm sorry. I'm crying again. I wasn't gonna dio back like this. It's not cry to where? Just like it's still a Davis time. Otherwise, yeah, yeah, I just I was reading out. Yeah, just really bad cry that No, it's Rice swear it's happy Tears. It's just it is. That's all it is. So it's happy here since not, though. So here's Teoh. Here's a gentleman A and my future. Happy through since not and to this virtual pride. Yeah, I

spk_1:   17:51
think it's gonna be

spk_0:   17:52
fine and it's gonna be fun, and it's gonna be very unique. And, um, because we've been doing online events at her, I just know we're all gonna meet Ah, lot of different people we wouldn't probably interacted with at actual physical pride. So, you know, that is a great thing. So, um, I'm very excited to see the lineup. I know people are gonna be super creative because there they already are. With all these events, eso proud will be no different. And again, it should excite us that we will probably meet and interact with people we weren't going to anyway, you know, whether that was in our city on um but we certainly will online. Um and yeah, let's keep our fingers crossed for a General Monet live or it's just a concert or just, you know, just saying Hi, you just put her voice on the screen. Yeah, I just get on live and just, you know, she could pull it Beyonce, where she just comes and speaks for, like, 30 seconds and then is like by Yeah, that's all. I mean, that's its on me, and I wouldn't have filled with pride. Yep, build. Speaking of pride, Billy Porters, Cinderella. And yes, I'm saying that out as Billy Porter Cinderella. That's not the title of the movie, but the title of the movie to me is the Reporters. Cinderella Border. Cinderella now has a release date. It is set to release on February 5th, 2021. Not sure if they want to think about that. Maybe they move it up to the end of this year. Probably won't be able to go well. We would probably be able to see it. Fingers crossed, but was later next year in theaters. But I'm excited for it. I'm excited for it, of course, really caught a lot of flak from different parts of the human community. Hey, turn that are? Yup, Just born haters. I'm breeders. Um, and you know, I'm excited for this. Like again, I think, uh, let's see, it will feel really care for Camilla Compel. Oh, but, you know, that's that's neither here nor there, because it is Billy porters, Cinderella. It will be aliveness, and that's all that matters. So it has a release date. So everybody look out for that and I know it's gonna be fabulous. You know what it is gonna But you know what I'm excited about? It reminds me of the Whitney. You see, that's what I was about to say. T Cinderella. Oh, yeah, Exactly. Titled it they totally Rodgers and Hammerstein's Cinderella when really it was Whitney Houston. It was Whitney Houston. Cinderella? Yeah, Billy Porter, Cinderella. You know, you do not appreciate the fairy godmother and nuts and you want to come over here, baby about but a boob in right stuff, and that's just what it is and the fact that it's gonna be like a modern take. I hope that Billy Porter gets more of like a presence. Yeah, screen. And also a saying where it's like, Yes, I'm going to sit here and make you look fabulous. But this person better love you for your personality typing. I feel like, yeah, I have some actual nuggets and basically is care his character from post like I I want. I want some fearing it fierceness. I want some nuggets of information. Obviously, it'll be funny, and it probably will be great. But I am excited for Billy Porter. Cinderella will be out February of next year. So excited who? So that's all we have this week for Queer of. They're a queer events, current events, not I'm so uses just saying Queer events. I know. But you know, that's the news, You guys, it's a queer news Queer news. We're gonna Segway right into our bad queers advice segment. Am I a bad queer singer? Questions. Too bad Queers Podcast at gmail dot com to be featured. This is our advice segment that ranges all topics of the queer experience. The 1st 1 this week is from Dre. I'm gonna get my advice segment Voice together. Yeah, Now it's my favorite right? Am I a bad queer? Trey? Am I a bad clear reading it like it's like a book, and I know like I don't like what it is like a title for a Ford drank. Okay, Um, am I a bad queer? If I'm a stud who's in touch with my feminine side? No drink. Damn. All right. I feel like I feel like presenting. I'm sorry. I feel like any time I try to talk or date someone and they see that I am more masculine presenting their immediately not into it. I have a lot of feminine tendencies, but it just feels like I keep getting put into this box based on how I look and not based on me as a person. How do I find the right balance of stud and thin energy when my outward appearances. Hard core stud Trey While Dre. What a question. That's great. Great. Great question. No, you're not a bad queer. The beauty of the last 10 years, I would say, And I'm 31. I'll be 32. This year has been how fluid we've been in our own community. I remember when you know, stud on stud dating? Uh, probably primarily in the PSC community. I don't

spk_1:   22:59
know if

spk_0:   22:59
that's a big thing in the in the white community. Queer community with it, But anyways, that's such a It was like a no no, Like, it was so weird to see too masculine women dating. And

spk_1:   23:10
I'm gonna be

spk_0:   23:10
honest. At first, I was prejudiced, prejudiced against it, too. Like I didn't really totally understand. Probably cracked a couple jokes about it. Like who? Like what goes down in the bedroom, and that's where most people go to. And I had to check my own Ah, presser like thoughts and tendencies and jokes with that where I'm just like, why would I care? And they're still to women, like Why do I care? In fact, it is. Sometimes I think it probably would be pretty cool, you know, depending on like the relationship you like you really it really is like a close friendship kind of relationship. Since I actually know a couple Stone said, uh um dates. But I say all that to say, Dre, um, there's nothing wrong with that. You be you be a diet study. I'm a diet stud, too. I have masculine energy. Sorry. Ate diets. Sudden. Yes. That needs to be a diet. Said Yeah. Oh, man. Diet stud here. You know, I am Definitely, definitely not. Not Ah. I would never be mistaken for a hard course that I know that. But, um and that's probably actually, when I talked, people would know I'm not. But anyways, I say all this to say it's totally fine. You are still a beautiful woman. Dre. You be in touch with your feminine side. There is a queen out there right now that will love you for your diets, deadness. And we'll love that. Sure, in touch with your feminine and your masculine side and take you for you. So, no, Dre, you're not a bad queer for that. In fact, anyone who says or has a problem with you, actually, they're the bad queer. What I did there. You see that, Shannon? You did what I did. Guys. I felt it. I saw it. I saw the path as your paving. It was beautiful, but I want to come back to diet. Said because we're not discussing that. Just yeah, not Dre. Look, everybody needs to be in touch with their feminine side. Everybody needs to be enough for their masculine side. Everybody just needs to be in touch with her side. That represents them. like fuck all of these things where people always think, like, you know, even goes back to the whole belief that, you know, macho guys should not like getting their nails done or whatever else. And it's like, Look, my brother is a classic big ass black dude. Looks kind of gangster, like if you saw him on the street, some people still give him, like the Saudi, But he's like the nicest, gentlest, most wonderful human ever and took him in my other big ass cousin to go and give their nails done. And they love it. And it's like a thing where it's just like great letting people appreciate some nice things and not have toe gender. It like going to get your nails done is Hi, Jane, it's not. Oh, that's what women do know. It's regular hygiene and go and do it like live your life. And that's what I want you to do. I want you to live your life literally. Your question is the reason we created this podcast. Exactly. Everybody puts you in a box of Syria types that you feel like your own, like you're putting yourself under pressure to live up to these standards. So to impress who, like you could miss out on somebody great. Who would have liked you for you embracing whichever side of you you want to in that moment. But if you're trying to play up to this whole, if I'm gonna commit to being a stud, I need to be super stud. And I need to do all these things, and I need to take on what stereotypical men rules are blood, blood, blood, like, not fuck that. Yeah, you said. And do you embrace it? Be sensitive people like hugs. People need to be emotional because, you know, that's also like, Trey, I'm going to make the assumption that you're also black gonna make that assumption. Yeah, well, Lisa stud here, er and so also within the black community. That is a thing that, like, if you feel like you're supposed to more masculine, that you shouldn't be showing these feelings that you need to be tough and you need to be all of this stuff. It's like it's so I feel like you're also getting this from, you know, that trauma of having it from growing up in life as a black queer person and now being a more masculine presenting person like that's coming from all different directions in all parts of your identity that you're so used to. And I'm very proud of your streaking up against it and being like, you know, this is me and that's what it is. So I want you to deep dive into that and own it and know that there are people who are leaning into it more and more every day. As Chris said, like the last 10 years have been drastic improvements like we have people talking about and about going to therapy and having feelings and do it this and crying in public like hard core. Even there's even studs having babies. Like just all of these things have heard in the last 10 years that it's your several, many good stories about starting a great starting. Oh my God, we're gonna post them. We're gonna do it. No, it's It's an awesome thing and I will say like I did struggle with that drayd during most well college because that's when I actually came out. But even before college, when I was in high school and I was very aware of being queer, and we had a whole hallway That was the Dee Hall, which, unsurprisingly, was a die call because, you know, breeders or clever. But, um, I always felt out of place until, ah, I got older because I felt that I had to pick either or it was like definitely a lot of just kind of hard core studs that, you know, may or may not look like little Wayne. Or you had to be this, like, supremely Finn chick and being heels. And that was like my upbringing worth. That was, if you were a gay person like it was already we were that was likely that there was no it was already hard enough being omens way. But then it was just like you better pick a side within that, and I never got it. And even when I struggled three in college and was trying to figure things out, I was at a party. I was at a gay club once, and I had a ah, FIM check, asked me what I was, and I didn't understand what she was saying, and she was like, Are you a center of it? Like really threw me for a loop. One thing I never did was change myself. I probably I I just Yeah, like I just was comfortable being in my own skin. I knew I couldn't. I couldn't keep up that, like, really macho persona. Anyway, I don't like conflict, So it would have just served me any any purpose. And, you know, I don't like things superfine and either, but I just gotta be yourself. And I'm glad everything kind of worked out, obviously the way that it did in this last 10 years. But looking back on it, I see some old me is a 31 year old. Now I see older as the older studs in the community, and they they don't look happy because I know that they weren't able. Teoh explore themselves as much as they wanted to, and some of that was internalized. And some of that was socialized where it's like, No, they had to be one way or the other. Meanwhile, the younger generation gets to be whomever they want, which is how it all should have been. So draibi yourself, you're not a bad queer and, yeah, stick to be out of that nothing wrong with the diet stud right side around here. This is I that raised out here. That's when I love it. Okay. Our next. Am I? A bad queer comes from Ash. Am I bad queer? If I don't understand labels, it took me a while to figure out that I'm gay. But after coming out, I realized that there are so many sub labels. What the heck are all these other labels? Stud fem stem. Well, you and Dre should talk. Um, and where do I fit? Well, no, I mean, you

spk_1:   30:14
just came out. Give yourself some

spk_0:   30:15
time. Stuff came out. You I mean, the fact that OK, so a lot of people will look at some of these phrases to be like, Oh, my God. These are the basics. You should already know that. No, the fact that you're asking the question and finding out early and looking to that also you there's, you know, lots of resource is out there for it. You're not a bad queer. You just like you just came out. How about this? I'm a flip the script on you. And rather than figuring out what other labels there are, do you boo. Don't even look at him. Don't even learn what a stud or if m or anything else is. Just go out and be you. Because then everybody sits and does all of these crazy sub label category things. And that's when we talked with that person or one of the things. Words like, Oh, do I need to know the whole alphabet? No, you don't even know. You know, all these labels, there's so many things I'm gonna plot, twist it and say, Don't even if I can learn it, Don't do it. Yeah, I'm out here like who you like. Do what you want to do. Understand the person for who they are in keeping movie That's the plot twists I'm gonna get. If I was about to go through Like when I initially saw this, I wanted to go through, like, define it for you. E like this is typically how people want to present outwardly what? No. But that like who you like and live that life. That's what I'm gonna do, Ash. I don't even know if all these labels, they're gonna be relevant Another 10 years. Honestly, like I'm not even sure if that's gonna be a thing like, Well, you know, it will still live with, you know, some of the older communities. But I mean, from what I see so far, mostly younger kids don't like labels of any kind at all. Like they just want to be No, that's so just be just be asked. You just came out like you just came out. Like it's just just be just be speaking if it is not to do anything else. I love that you just what's right? You just just just like, you know, you have to figure anything out like there's not gonna be There s where there's not like a weekly quiz, queer quiz or anything that goes around now it's your fine, It's still fine. You go. Boom. But happy coming out. Congratulations. Oh, well, congrats. So last question is from Toyo toy ask Am I a bad queer? So hear me out. Noble always starts wrong. Go great with you. Yes. Yes, you are. Who? I'm gonna take a deep breath. I see the next sentence. Okay, so hear me out. I have been married to my husband for the last six years. Things have been great he provides. But I have always wanted to explore. Oh, boy, I ended up fucking a girl who also has a girl at home. And now I love both this girl and my husband. What do I do? Toya? No, Toya. Jesus Christ. You know, Toyota, talk about a Explorer Explorer toyou. Sure did. It took that literally and figuratively and then took it back to literally Wow. Uh, Toya know. OK, so you're not a bad queer, but you are a bad wife. So, you know, take that for what it is. Um

spk_1:   33:19
not sure you had to

spk_0:   33:19
explore on your husband's that maybe, you know, I'm all about honesty and hurry things. I don't think it was, you know, right, cheating on your husband, You know, not knowing about your marriage, but it's, you know, it's just not a good look. No good for karma. Uh, but no, um, you're not a bad queer for that. Ah, God. And now you you love the girl. No, no, no. I would want to ask more questions about why you like this girl. What do you like about this girl? How long have you known this girl? Is this your first riel. Same sex encounter. I have questions. Toya. I mean, six years of marriage is really pretty solid. You said very nice vanilla things about your husband. Um, about Bonilla. Great. And that insisted five

spk_1:   34:08
high. Because when your

spk_0:   34:09
life has been great, he provides. But I've always wanted You didn't say anything. First compliment. He want to give him what it is, what it is. You know what you know and are you Do you still Are you in love with them? Do you still have love for him? He's He's your husband yelling close because he provides. Right? Right. I know what you're doing. Prides. So diet. No, you're not a back we're. But you're a bad wife. You need to figure that out with your husband. Don't bring that girl into this. Don't don't break. She's

spk_1:   34:37
already She's

spk_0:   34:38
girls into it. But don't. Maybe the girl does. I don't know. The girl knows or doesn't. But like, figure your things out with your legal husband and then see what you want to do about this girl. And also figure out your feelings to my God. Uh, this is just messy. It's messy. It is messy. This is not how you there's a right way to explore, but this is certainly a messier way of exploring. Look, Chris is trying to give you all the nice and polite things, like what to do right now and has, like, actively made sure that I haven't spoken because to see my face as I was talking through this and look okay, I kind of think in some ways we can, like, flip this and be like, you know, our last two are technically bad queers, because it's like, Hey, yes, you are a bad queer because you're owning yourself and not following these stereotypes. And yes, you are a bad queer because you know what? Fuck these labels and do whatever. Like great job you. I'm gonna take this in a figurative way of saying, Yeah, you're a bad queer because you fucking cheated one. And you're over here bringing another girl into this to where she already has baggage. On top of that, that's three like, and now you're coming back and being like you. But can I have both? Girl, this is what makes bisexual people look bad. And that's what makes you were Don't give it into that trope. This is what makes by women look bad. Why? Everybody sits there. It is like, Oh, by people are just greedy. No, they're not. They know their feelings, and they know what they want. Your over here, you're actually over here just being greedy and be like, Yeah, but I want oh, and toyou have a mouth. You communicate with both of those people like it's no need to bring. You are back where? I'm sorry. I'm gonna upgrade your order backward back because you're right. You know what? I did it. I was being sympathetic to the pretty her. If I were

spk_1:   36:15
to say, Yeah, you brought this girl into

spk_0:   36:17
this mess lately? She

spk_1:   36:19
wanted

spk_0:   36:19
to be a part of this. And she does. Because she did it knowing that she has a girl at home to know there is a hot Yeah, person was innocent in all of this is the husband I'm gonna name him. I don't even know what I want to name a name. A Mark Mark is the only innocent one out of all American. The girl, the girl's girl. The girl's girl. Yeah, she's also in it. All of the outside people are in this. And the other girl has brought herself in this. And that's why I was trying to bring Mark back into this situation and do whatever I'm like. Nope. This is what makes by people look bad and they're not bad people. And they're not all of these things. And also, you're just over here like I'm not like she made it sound like, Oops, I slipped and ended up fucking her like No, hear me out Because doing Please, girl, you knew what you were doing. May dictating. Found it. You're the one that is Oh, Toya! Yeah, You are bad queer. My bad. I look my bad with my previous statement. You you actually are like that. And you're not bad queer in a good way. Ah, no, Like that. Messi can be backwards in good ways. But you weren't, and that's what it is. Uh, get out of here! You out of here! Go fix that! Go fix that! I did, Except you're I mean, it happens like it's not unheard of toy like you're not like the worst person in the world. But my God, Go fix that. Fix that up! Fix it sat up clean a moving on. You better take care of this man that provides I know you provide. You literally give it here. That was the first. Not like saying he's lovely. Treats me so well. Yeah, he provides, Like, that's what I feel like. She just did that. Like when I read that I read it like a shrug. He provides Samer mess. He provide I come home, this food on the table, this river, my head. Great. It's like girl, I didn't want to add a thin, but I love him. No, no, no. I feel like you're just used to him. And you're loving this. Who were a little color out like that. Like I said it. I said, let me say it again. Say it again, Dio. She loves this girl. She's used to him Who? That's all that is. Yeah, you got some self reflection to do there, but that is that is a line to take you on that journey. You talk about your therapy session girl, right? All right, well, that is the end of our am I a bad queers it by section segment. Excuse me. Uh, make sure you send your questions to bad Queers pod at gmail dot com to be featured backwards. But all right, we're off to our favorite favorite segment, cause what's happened back Cruz would be if we didn't have any bad queer opinions. And this week is going to be gold, and I mean literally and figuratively. Chris, would you like to give you a bad queer people? Cool Segways? Thank you. Well, my bad queer opinion is that, Ah,

spk_1:   39:10
we have to

spk_0:   39:10
stop using the term Gold star lesbian. And I say that as a gold star lesbian. I just think it's on the planet, and it's

spk_1:   39:19
kind of like

spk_0:   39:21
it's unnecessary dig. You know, I

spk_1:   39:24
don't know when

spk_0:   39:24
I started to feel like maybe probably the last two times I said, It is not like I say it a lot, but it's just kind of like, okay, I mean, OK, but I don't think that's important to say, or like, a distinction that has to be made in the community anymore. And it kind of does like shame, others for like either having ah, um, sex with a man or whatever, or even penetration. Some people take it as seriously as like no penetration at all. But in it in the context of it being no sex with the man, there's a lot of reasons why people do and all that. And I just think same. Elemental seven is like, lame. You no is lying. And again, I'm saying this as a gold star lesbian and as a person who has said it a lot like note against a shit like who cares? Okay, you didn't sleep with a guy who cares? So that's my backwards have been it. I know, you know, some of us take pride in that, and I understood I understood growing up more. So why? Because it's like you felt like Oh, yeah, I dodged the the, um either the trap or the need to feel like you have to, you know, try things out with, you know, somebody of the opposite sex. Um, whatever reason that you didn't have sex. I don't think it's important to tell the rest of community that you haven't had sex with a man like nobody gives a shit. So that's

spk_1:   40:41
my back. Where opinion.

spk_0:   40:42
I just think it's kind of place and look, just I support that as a person who was not a gold year did just say that when somebody does, Yeah, and it's like you sit and say And like, I remember the first time learning about it, and it was recently after I came out, And people are like, Oh, yeah, like your You go start. And I was like But I worked with you, so I always just thought if, like, my gold star my paper like a you know, college. And, um And I remember the first time I was shamed for it. And it was from, like to more like stud presenting, Yeah, women that I worked with and they stopped, like, what? You're not a gold star. And they're like, Oh, my God, this is just this like I did on there like, I don't know if you are able to appreciate it and kiss and it's almost like you're tainted. And I was like, Yeah, like, yeah, Oh, God, like you don't know. You know my life, you know what happened is like circumstances clean. I'm tested its whatever. It's not like my part, and I'm like my who are My vagina is ruined because anything else entered their like as long as I took the proper precautions and got tested and use protection like cool. Great. Um, in all their if your adult. So letting meaning that's the next one is that I'm grown and I could do what I want with what I want. Exactly. So I support your bad queer opinion. Yeah, let's let it go. Nobody cares. No way. I was like, If you feel the need to continue this time, maybe you start a meet up with other boats are lesbians and just other people who care about that. But, like in regular his speech and talk not not ever. And I would venture to say it's borderline slurry. Sh! And that's the Segway into Shana's bad queer opinion.

spk_1:   42:30
Look at you. You're gonna come from

spk_0:   42:31
with this little sassy Segway. I see you, Segways. See, you should be seasick. Waits is gonna make that make anything. It is the year of the 2020. Queer is no longer slur. It's just that it's not. This is why we titled our podcast this way. This is why I identify as queer is reclaimed phrase that I use loud and proudly. And if I like it louder for the people in the back T o re claimed phrase that I use loud and proudly and lots of other people in the LGBTQ plus community used probably as well. This is one of those things where it's like, Oh my God, But it used to be And now it's not. And it's like And now this is This is one of very few times that I will do it probably never, ever. But this is the equivalent using the n word. It really is one of those things like you stop and it's like it's a different thing when you're using it as a black person in the way that you say it's towards somebody because it could definitely be derogatory. And it was just like a who's Who's the guy that was recently on the new show that was like, You know, you want to say it's going to say you could say it. Oh my God, what is that actor's name? Right? Oh, my God, it was so good that when he was like I e it, whatever you can to say it, I know it's gonna drive me grab right after that, it's like it's at the point now where so many things are going through and like we're using phrases that are becoming more inclusive and actual definition of queer like allows it for a bigger umbrella of a queer term. Like I use queer now instead of, like, lesbian and things like that. Not because I'm ashamed of a lesbian title, but because I actually know that I'm not like my interests are not limited by just liking a cyst woman, you know, and things like that, like mine is not under like that limited umbrella. And I feel like we're kind of encapsulates all of that, and I appreciate how much it is. Yes, it's totally used to be just like faggot used to be, and people are reclaiming that I don't like, you know, like dyke totally being reclaimed. All of these things that are that used to be seen, a slurs are now being used as statements of empowerment, and I want to hold on to that and keep it moving forward where it's like so many people. Even now I've posted on social media about it and people still come out and they're like, No, this is this and whatever else and the one thing that made me like, really sad about it was seeing it's because right now it's lesbian visibility Week and I went on Twitter to just go and start to Hashtags and see what people were talking about. Do all that. And there were so many people that instead of celebrating being a lesbian and the identity of lesbian and being proud lesbian women, all of these things, it was like I am a lesbian. I'm not queer and it's like it takes away the celebration because now you're knocking somebody else's identity because you're a lesbian. It's almost like some lesbians think that they're like the all knowing, all powerful lesbian. And that's the best on the women's side of like the queer identity. And it's like not get off your high horse and let people use the identity that they want to use. Just because your lesbian does not mean that you are more than or because I identify as queer, I'm lesser than in any way, shape or form like yeah, I know how this works. It is 2020. Queer is no longer store a solar. Come at me I mean, that is, as you mentioned, it is it is like the n word. It's not obviously the same thing. Historically, um, in the same way, Same impact. But

spk_1:   46:11
it's the same thing,

spk_0:   46:13
you know, and it's It's a term where it's just like for me, it's just easier for me to say Queer like I just It's easier for me to say Queer, It's all encompassing like I don't have to say like it's just an easy word to say for me. Um, and I'm just more comfortable with saying I'm queer, like just less.

spk_1:   46:35
He was

spk_0:   46:36
always kind of weird to say to me like I I was always a person to say, Oh, I'm gay, you know, I didn't really like the word lesbian like I just did it. I don't know what it is, and regardless of that, their words that are reclaimed all the time, this is no different. Uh, I personally didn't like the term dyke growing up, but that is just something You know what? I've never attacked anybody in our community for using dyke, because if there's any derogatory term in our community, if it's not being used in a derogatory way. Yep. I'm gonna let us say it like it is like, if you don't want queer toe happen, it doesn't have to happen for you. You could still be whoever you call yourself. You know, whatever you have never gonna happen. Stop trying to make right. Like, No, it's happening. Queers a thing. Queer is no longer slur. And, yeah, like, it's just, you know, times change, language change. Ah, sentiments changing everything. You know, I know people have personal stories with this and have had a bad experiences and and just grew up with this being a slur. Trust me, I get it. But yeah, in the same way that inward was reclaimed by our community, the black community, you know, queer is the same way. It's the same thing. Like, you could definitely have opinion. You

spk_1:   47:57
don't have to be

spk_0:   47:58
down for it either. But you also can't take anybody else's right within the community to say it were to identify. Is that so? Yeah. If you don't like the word queer, don't use the word queer. Same with it. Within word, it's so crazy. How simply can be It's really simple. Honestly, you say it out loud, and it's just like a man, right? So little effort on everybody's part two. Just do that crazy, that's all. Like, just don't use it then them. Thank you for tuning into our back or opinions. You know what time it is? It's almost time for us to leave you. But of course, we would never leave you without some shout outs to our faves and things that you should check out. So, uh, my SHUT out this week goes to the show. Little fires everywhere. Mm Carrie Washington playing a messy queer person. She is a messy, queer person of color in the nineties. 00 God, Like the fact is, we aren't talking about it enough. You know what else? We're not talking about the fact that there is not just Kerry Washington in there, but there is the character of Izzy, who is also like freshly in the high school coming into her identity. It's like perfect seeming home that Reese Witherspoon has seemingly created, and she's trying to figure out her sexuality as well. And it's amazing. It's incredible, and I don't understand how there's only basically that I've seen has only been one article written about the LGBTQ plus side of this, and that's from the advocates. So go the f get um, and I'm just like, how are we not talking about the fact that these air outs characters in the nineties from different levels of living like you have the beautiful, higher class, higher middle upper middle class type family in the perfect little house, doing the perfect little thing seeming perfect? And then you have the mom who is running away from all of these things and crazy underlying stories and so many other stories air happening. And then it's just like normal queer storyline mixed in there. And that's how shows should be. And I love it and shut out to y'all, Kerry Washington Girl I've loved you before And now seeing my little fantasies in my head come true with you in this story I'm living and I got out that I was a lesbian, right? I love it. Uh, did you ever see she hate me? I mean, this bank. I didn't like the movie in the premise of the movie. I haven't seen she everything. She hate me. I don't have I mean, it was a dumb premise because it was like Spike Lee being in his. Yeah, whatever back anyways, it she was not. He is. She is what the movie is about. A guy who loses his corporate job, and he essentially just goes around, um, and agrees to impregnate lesbians. So Kerry Washington is also lesbian in that movie. So I get on in 2000 for get out in 2004. So my young gay self was just like us. So great sex scenes in that 10 well, And my shot out that way. See, Segways, that is a look. That's like the name of the episode. Uh, my shot out this week is to ethical porn site Queer porn dot tv. I started this show out with a sexual related term inning with the sexual shot out. This is the ethical porn side. Queer porn dot tv. Check it out. If you're quarantining by yourself or

spk_1:   51:31
with your partner,

spk_0:   51:32
give it a look. You know, a little ethical porn you don't have to. I feel bad about watching it and everything. And it's queer porn. So queer porn, that TV, all that? Yeah, amazing. Were porn site. I feel like We've learned so much today. I did a good job. Team this great, great great job. Great job today. Where's the information? Y'all? We'll see you next week. All right, Take care. Go.